Happiness is more than just a fleeting emotion; it is a state of being that encompasses overall well-being, peace, and contentment.
It is not a constant state of grinning, and it is natural to experience other emotions like sadness, fear, anger, or disappointment and even stress.
However, being in tune with our inner happiness means that we do not let those emotions control us or hold us back.
Merely desiring more happiness will not magically make it appear.
The happiest people are those who take control of their attitudes, thoughts, feelings, and behaviors with intentionality.
Happiness is an inside job!
The power to create our own happiness resides within each of us, which when you think about it, is incredibly empowering.
Additionally, we can build on our happiness set-point.
We can create a bigger and stronger foundation of happiness, and allow it to give us the support to keep our stress and anxiety levels at a place where we recover and regroup so much easier.
One of the keys to knowing your internal happiness and tapping into it more consistently, is stopping to notice, becoming aware of what expands us-lights us up, or contracts us-brings us down.
Do this for a moment:
Sit up straight. Put your shoulders back and open your arms wide. Take a good deep breath and smile.
Close your eyes…and notice how you feel.
I’m imagining you might feel:
Light, open, free, peaceful
Think of someone you love, admire and love being around.
You are probably experiencing that same expanded feeling.
Now do this:
Hunch your shoulders, make fists, take some quick short breaths and put a frown on your face.
Notice how you feel.
Maybe, anxious, tight, agitated, heaviness in your body…contracted, right?
If you think of someone who aggravates you or you fear even, you’ll feel this same contracted feeling.
Next: Take a piece of paper:
Make 2 columns: 1 column says expansion, other one says contraction.
Now, Close your eyes, take a breath, and think about all the people in your life, your relationships, your job/career/work life, your home, etc.
Next: List all the people, relationships, etc activities in your life that light you up under expansion.
Notice how you feel. Write down how you feel. Name the feelings, i.e. light, floaty; tingly, Write down where you feel these feelings.
Now, under contraction, list all the things you thought about that gave you a contracted feeling-a dragging you down feeling, under contraction.
Notice how you feel. Name that feeling, if you can, i.e. tightness, congestion, etc.
These are areas in your life that you can choose to course correct. These are most likely areas/people situations that may cause you stress and anxiety.
Now, during the day, take 5 minutes at least 3 to 5 times a day and look at the list you made that lights you up.
Allow yourself to really feel how you feel when you think about these things.
Feel where it is in your body.
When you feel these feelings at a peak…either put your thumb and forefinger together or put your hand on your heart.
Either one is good. Your choice. You are now anchoring in that feeling state with a physical association.
Take a good deep breath. Exhale it out long and slowly.
Take another look at the list that expands you and lights you up…as you go about your day.
You are building your foundation of happiness.
Keep your focus on how you are feeling throughout the day: expanded or contracted.
No judgements-just observe yourself and know you now have a means of changing that feeling state!
If you find yourself feeling contracted-dragged down-use your “anchor” to elicit the feelings of expansion-what lights you up and you may want to look at that list again.
You’ll most likely notice as you continue doing this, you’ll feel lighter, and more connected to what’s important to you and your innate happiness.
Keep practicing this and you’ll form a new habit-a happiness habit-that will keep the stressors from taking over!
If you’d like to learn more happiness “habits” shoot me an email and I’ll gladly send you the emails from the Challenge.
If you’d like to delve deeper and get more support to getting rid of old beliefs that are holding you back, finding more ways to connect to your innate happiness, or releasing anything that is holding you back from feeling your best self, please do not hesitate to connect with me via the Breakthrough the Challenge of Change FREE phone discovery session.
It’s a powerful session that will allow you to get clear on what it is that is holding you back and what your next steps are in moving forward.
Wishing you tons of expansive feelings!
Your Stress and Anxiety Relief Specialist